Horizons Developmental Resource Center
Evaluation and Treatment of Autism, Aspergers, ADHD, Learning Disabilities, Sensory Processing Disorder, Behavior Disorders
As I was wandering around the Minneapolis airport recently, I found a store with a variety of posters, cards, and wall hangings with quotes and sayings on them. As I perused the options, I found one that I had to purchase and bring back to the office. Here is the quote:
Peace. It does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble, or hard work. It means to be in the midst of those things and still be calm in your heart. (Author unknown)
I’ll never forget my first job. I started working at a very small restaurant, about 20 tables, with only one other waitress. The first day on the job I was handed an apron, a pad of paper, and a pen; and told to get to work. I was given no guidance on how to wait tables. The restaurant became immediately busy, and I just started taking orders. Miraculously, I got the drinks out to the right tables; but by the time the food orders were up, I had no idea where to go with the orders. I started walking up to my tables and asking; “Did you order the shrimp basket?” “Please tell me that you ordered the shrimp basket!” “Somebody from this table must have ordered the shrimp basket!!!” As you can imagine, my stress increased as the restaurant got busier and I still had no idea where to bring the food! I failed at my job that day, and was feeing completely incompetent as a waitress; especially when my boss told me how disappointed he was in me!
The sun is beginning to shine, and the fresh smells of spring are upon us. This time of year is always a favorite of mine, whether I am working with clients or walking through the park with my sons. One thing is for sure, this time of year is always busy in school systems. Special educators, parents, and support staff alike generally meet together for an annual Individualized Education Plan (IEP) for the coming school year. For those of you who are unfamiliar with them, IEPs are usually completed in the spring for students receiving special education services. When preparing for IEPs, it is essential for parents and educators alike to think about the conclusion of the current school year and the beginning of the next, and how they will support the child during this time.
Communication is a dynamic process. It goes way beyond the words we say. Many people interchange the words communication, language, and speech; but these terms are not synonymous. Speech refers to the actual words or sounds that are coming from your mouth. Language is the grammar, meaning and ability to use the words you have. When people talk about language, they are referring to both verbal and non-verbal language. Communication encompasses both language and speech, but it is more than that. It is the ability to share thoughts and experiences in a meaningful way while taking in, processing, and responding to the person you are talking with.
All children exhibit less-than-desirable behaviors at one time or another. Sometimes children exhibit many of these behaviors throughout the day, especially in the case of children with neurodevelopmental disorders. The behaviors can take over everyone’s lives and become the focus of our interactions with these children. Too often we blame the child, when what we need to do is analyze what the child’s behavior is telling us and how we can best support his or her functioning. This involves looking beyond what is on the surface to see what physical and emotional needs lie beneath.
Four years ago this past September, I decided to undertake one of the largest projects in my life. I went back to school to work toward a doctorate in clinical psychology, which has definitely been rewarding and challenging at the same time. After completing my coursework 18 months ago, I began a new chapter in this journey: my doctoral internship at our local children’s hospital. This experience was enriching and eye opening for me in many ways, both as a professional and as a parent. Now that I have closed this chapter in my journey as well, I feel it is important to share some of the observations I have made over the course of my internship experience. I realized very early on that families seem to have many misconceptions when they arrive at a psychologist’s office for help or testing. I hope that by sharing my experiences it will be easier for parents and professionals alike to understand psychology and the assessment process.
I’ve been thinking about dysregulation and developmental “growth spurts” lately, as my 9-month old daughter has had a weeklong stretch of frustrating behavior. Normally she is a very easy baby; content to hang out with us and do whatever. She generally likes to be held, likes to play with toys on the floor, sleeps through the night, etc. Two weeks ago she learned to crawl —that funny army crawl where babies kind of use their elbow and knee to propel themselves forward as they move across the floor (OT’s in the audience-yes I know the importance of doing a cross-crawl but for now she is doing it this way!). She wants to get everywhere and she is FAST! There is now a lot of time spent telling her “no you can’t go there,” and picking her up to move her back to a space where she can be. She has also started to wake up quite a bit in the night; crying out and banging on her crib rails. I’ll go into her room to see her trying to pull herself up in the bed. Then she gets mad when she falls down onto the mattress. During the day she seems to be is frustrated and upset about everything! She doesn’t want to be on the floor unless she is allowed to crawl wherever she wants to. She doesn’t want to be in her jumper or her exersaucer; but she doesn’t really want to be held either. Basically she just wants to be on the go and exploring her newfound mobility, and if she can’t then she is MAD!
I recently read the book “Growing Girls: The Mother of All Adventures”. Jeanne Marie Laskas, a mother of two little girls adopted from China, writes this story. What an adventurous life this family has, and what a fun book to read. Her writing style has kept me interested in what is going to happen next, as I’ve laughed with her and cried with her. She also adds an educational component, helping her readers understand the parents’ perspective of dealing with issues of adoption and language development. Her youngest daughter has apraxia, and portions of the story discuss the family’s journey to helping her daughter develop speech. Here is a segment from her book:
In a culture where our lives have become inundated with electronics, it is important for parents to teach children the value of spending “unplugged” time together. Whether your children are toddler or teens, here are some simple electronics-free ideas you can implement to encourage the development of relationships, communication, and thinking skills:
My husband and I recently had a comprehensive neuropsychological evaluation done for our 10-year-old son due to concerns in the areas of attention, immaturity, and reading comprehension. The results were thorough and very helpful to us as parents, especially as we think about how best to support his learning and behavior both in and out of school.
My question is about what I am obligated to provide to the school in terms of the report. The school has not been concerned about our son’s performance for years now, even when we have raised some concerns with them. They have never initiated an evaluation themselves, and didn’t seem very interested when we told them we would be pursuing an evaluation outside of school. However, now that the evaluation has been completed they are demanding to see the final report. They now tell us that they need to see it in order to provide appropriate supports to our son, who is in a general education 4th grade class and doing fairly well.
There is no need for an IEP and we are not requesting that they do anything specific at this point. I would like to share some of the information with them, especially related to strategies that might benefit our son in the classroom. However, I am very hesitant to share the entire report as it contains a lot of specific and personal information about our son and family. Also, I don’t want our son to be labeled or judged by teachers now and in the future based on the information in the report. Do you have any thoughts on how we could proceed?
Thanks,
Kiera in Michigan
